Losing a loved one is one of the toughest experience that you will endure. When I lost my sister, I stopped functioning for awhile. I could sense people being annoyed with me when I was at the store or at work because my mind was always some place else, so they thought I was a complete airhead. For awhile, I had these deadlines quickly approaching, so I couldn’t take off right away. It was hard to continue working, but I didn’t want to let my team or I down.
This morning one of my cats passed away. Last night I noticed that she was just sprawled on the carpet, and I picked her to see what was wrong. She was having a hard time breathing. I knew something was wrong, so I took her to the vet this morning. The vet said that her symptoms resembled a condition called Feline Infectious Peritonitis (FIP). It is a virus that many kittens get, but there are a few who succumb to it. I swallowed hard because I knew that I had lost her. When they tried to take her blood, I did.
When you have deadlines to meet, and you are dealing with something as hard as grief, what do you do?
Take Some Time For Yourself
Take a few hours to cry and let it all out. Even if others see you crying, it doesn’t matter. It’s worse to keep everything inside. If you are someone who meditates, close your eyes and do just that. If you need to go for a run or bike ride, get out there and do it. You will feel much better, and you will have the energy to finish your work on time. After that, take a few days to rest. Grief is exhausting, and you need to take care of yourself.
Talk to Someone
The first thing I did when I got in the car was to call my mom. She got on the phone, and I cried and yelled for a few minutes. It made me feel so much better to have someone to listen to my grief. When I was leaving, the nurse offered to give me a hug. I wish I would have taken her up on the offer because I would have probably felt much better. We are social creatures, so don’t wallow in your misery alone. Find someone who wants to be there for you, and let that person in.
Power Through the Deadline and It Will All Be Over
One thing about deadlines is that they end. While you’re going through the process, you might be feeling tired and upset. However, tell yourself that it will all be over, and then you can cry all you want. For me, losing my sister was the hardest thing that has ever happened to me. I remember that I had all these meetings two days later that I couldn’t miss. I asked if I could do them over the phone or online, and everyone accommodated that. I got through the meetings, finished the work that needed to get done, and I forgot about anything else but taking care of my family and me.
Take it from me, it’s hard but you can do it.